I write this post not to gain sympathy but to identify with many of you. Many of us walk this path together but because of the stigma of mental illness, we believe we are all alone.
Depression is a terrible illness. I know because I have suffered from it since childhood. And like many religious leaders, pastors, priests, mystics, chaplains and other spiritual types, it affects us about twice as often as the general population. Madness and Mysticism know a fine line and some of us are called to walk it. The very salve we seek for our heart also pushes us closer to ruminating about human suffering.
Meditation helps. Going on silent retreat helps. Listening to Johnny Cash, Leonard Cohen, and a whole host of others help. Anyone who has battled this demon and composes a song to sing about it helps. Being older helps. I know this darkness. Daylight will come. The dark alley will turn a corner into light. But until then . . . .
I will try awfully hard not to think only of myself, my illness, my turn of events. The real scourge of depression is how narcissistic one can become. I reach out to you who suffer from this illness to remind you of this truth: you are not alone and neither am I.
I will try awfully hard not to think only of myself, my illness, my turn of events. The real scourge of depression is how narcissistic one can become. I reach out to you who suffer from this illness to remind you of this truth: you are not alone and neither am I.
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